Again time has leaped forward while I seem to be stuck in my life, unable to decide which direction to go, which step to take next. I visit the shores of Elbe where you can see far just by climbing on a dike – and then you walk to one of the two possible directions. For me, there seems to be more options but I cannot see far and I have to choose blindly. Some say, listen to your heart, but my heart is a chicken and says stay here, so I will not listen.
This month was my first anniversary in this city. It passed unnoticed. My mind has been occupied, with personal and work-related matters, but I hope I will have a chance to empty it. I need to visit nature more regularly, somehow I have lost that habit. I do small walks in the nearby areas, I try to pay attention to details, to find meaning in the senselessness around me. Some things telling me that it, or better yet, everything, matters. All I found this far is this. Perhaps it matters as it made me smile?
I missed the Hamburg winter because I was just then out of the city and after my trip I stayed five days in quarantine. When I got out, the spring was here. Yes, in February! And I feel as if my face has got sun burnt… So I was out enjoying the sun. Not much wildlife here in the city, but I’m amazed how much natural nature (the real one, that has not been taken care of) there is. Mostly it is quite scattered, but still seems to attract birds. I didn’t have my bird-lense available, so in addition to the birds, I also captured their habitats. And it is beautiful in all the shades (or one shade) of earth colors. If you don’t zoom in, the birds are also quite sharp ;). Still a long way to go in order to become a nature photographer…
Past weeks I have explored my newish neighborhood more purposefully. It also serves as a reason to go for city walks, because I usually tend to think walks are to be taken in nature. Another benefit is to practice my concentration when taking pictures with other people present. I think there has still been more objects that I thought would be worth a picture than objects that I actually stopped to photograph. I’m still proud of myself, maybe I will learn one day. (I have to admit though: I have also craved for a less noticeable smart phone to take pictures with instead of my way too attention-provoking system camera. Too often I also find myself just too lazy to take the camera out of my backpack.)
One thing I have became fascinated with is the many WWII bunkers around the city. Some of them are just left there to be destroyed by nature while others have new purpose as e.g. apartment buildings. Most of them are impossible not to spot, but there are also a few that I had passed many times without paying any attention (I still need to take pictures of those).
Do I have this love for concrete because of all my insecurities? Is this love common for humanity? Somehow I believe it is. (I only know fully gasped that the adjective concrete is also the material. How fitting.)
Someone told me in summer that the winter has come to Hamburg when the seagulls appear. They are here so I guess it’s winter. On Christmas Day, it was sunny and quite warm and I went for a walk like many others. People were feeding the seagulls in the lake in Stadtpark although it is prohibited. As a result, they were flying around a lot and as I really liked their reflections in the water as they were landing or taking off, I decided to practice my skills in photographing moving objects. I improved! These are my end results, but they are not perfect. Next I need to practice patience and how to ignore people around me. They make me uneasy and thus I have an urge to leave. I was actually a bit pissed after I left that I gave in to that urge. Why I care about what people think when I’m taking pictures when in general I really don’t care what they think?
This seems to have become a monthly blog, where, at the end of each month, I try to summarize the past four weeks with a few photos. This month I finally, because I was prompted by someone, started to use my camera with fully manual settings. I don’t know why I didn’t do it before, perhaps I thought it would be too complicated? Well, it is, a little, as if you set one thing somewhat off, it is not corrected with other, automatic, settings. But as I was told, it proved to be way more interesting. And the end result has been… way more pictures repeating the same (usually rather boring) object or landscape – slowly getting the settings in the place. Or not. Here are the first experiments of a lake view. I was, evidently, adjusting the exposure to the wrong direction. Never mind, I had some photos to play with later. (And yes, I’m a fan of strong contrast.)
(The next day after this post I was wondering about the title… I don’t think I have a colorful soul. I like black and white photography. But somehow I feel joyful, playful and happy, some days even more self-confident than I ever thought I could feel. So I guess the brightness suits my mood.)
I should take more sunrise pictures because I love the morning light. I should also take more rainy day pictures, and not only because it rains here a lot. And fog pictures. The problem is, that I don’t always have my camera with me when I go to e.g. work. I should perhaps get a smart phone, so I would always have it with me.
Here are a couple from on my way to work. I really need to get my camera cleaned as most of the pictures have ugly stains on them…
I got it all: Elbphi, pigeons, lamp post and a silhouette of a person in a same picture! For a while I was also trying to capture a flying pigeon but gave up shortly.
During the past couple of weeks the heat has exhausted me and I’ve made a habit of walking to the Elbe in the evenings to watch the sunset. There I was reminded of my lack of knowledge in photographing in the dark. Especially if the objects are moving and/or bright lights are included. I don’t claim to be any better now, I rely on getting the settings nearly right or accidentally capturing some usually unwanted feature which makes the picture interesting.
Almost each night, after sunset, the same dredger started its work in the river. These pictures are taken in different nights, the last one after I studied some basics of photography. The problem is, studying is not effective if I don’t get to experiment the effects myself. Now I see the results and I found myself intrigued to learn more. Although learning would be more effective if my brain activity was not shut down by the heat.
For the past weeks I have been ridiculously happy for no particular reason. (Ok, sometimes tired and lonely as well, so the happiness is not a continuum.) The happiness is not my camera but rather something it represents: not only looking but also seeing. And not merely looking and seeing what is around me, but to take the moment to reflect what is outside to the inside and vice versa. It’s the harmony of being, not only in this place and time, but more generally, joy of existing. Reaching that kind of harmony doesn’t require camera, it requires time and presence. I’m happy to have reached that luxury. Probably only momentarily, but I will post these pictures to remind me that it is possible.
mufinki 